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Aug 5, 2014

Bird Brain

       Heart pounding, heavy breathing, sweating profusely.....that's what happens after chasing a fledgling bird from my garage. I'd just come home from grocery shopping, which in itself is a torture. 
       With the last load of bags hooped on each arm, I noticed something from the corner of my eye I thought I saw something. But at my age I chalked it up to those floaties that break loose & float across the iris. I closed the garage door & went inside to put up all those groceries. When I went out to do a load of laundry.......once again, there was a blur of movement just out of my line of sight but this time I could have sworn I saw something. And then it happened........a bird flew by my head. Mind you, the garage doors were closed so I'm in an enclosed area with that little bird.
       Let's just say I went one way and the bird went the other for the time being. Of course I raised the doors and you'd think the little critter would fly out those doors but oooooohhhhhh nnnnooooo!
We went round and round and round until I was dizzy, the bird flew up into the loft to perch and looked down his beak accusingly at me. 
       That was it, I had had it!!!! What to do, what to do???
Granddad's shotgun??? Too brutal, plus there's not guarantee that I'd actually hit the little birdie. The pepper spary???? Too over the top and who's to say it wouldn't blow back somehow on me. 
       Think girl, think.
       Lightbulb!! (from Despicable Me - movie)
       Out came two cans of canned air (one of each hand cause I'm an old western fan.....six guns and such).....and it was on again. When all the air was gone, my blood pressure through the roof that little birdie decided to flitter away. I ran for the down buttons and thank goodness, the doors closed and I crawled into the house.
      Can you see the sweat on my brow????? I hope not because after 10 minutes with a cold ice pack on the back of my neck, my blood pressure and breathing finally under control, my shoulders unlocked and my spine relaxed.
      Did I mention that I don't like things that fly, crawl, slither, hop, flutter, gallop, lope, meander, etc.....you get the picture!!
      Note to self: Remember, you live in the country with wildlife so always drive into garage and immediately lower door!!

12 comments:

Chantal said...

If Grandma was still alive, she would say that it is lucky to have a bird fly into your house (or garage). I guess your luck was you didn't die of a heart attack. What a story to tell grand children!

Gene Black said...

I know what you mean Rhonda. If a bird gets too close, I panic. I Love watching them but I certainly don't want them touching me.

Betsy said...

I know exactly what you went through. When we first moved here we were attacked by mocking birds. To this day I get chills up my spine!

Kristie said...

Sorry, but I had to laugh! :) We had a bat that came down the chimney once and I panicked over it! :( Birds are pretty to watch but they are hard to control.
Kristie

Gari in AL said...

Whew!

Gari in AL said...

Whew!

Needled Mom said...

I'm glad you survived the ordeal to recall it for all of us. Glad it all turned out well.

Vicki H said...

I am glad it all worked out. I reminded of a picture my mom and grandma had of me with my grandma's bird on my head. I was about 18 months at the time. They had barely taken the pic and I grabbed the bird and threw it across the room. The bird lived, but grandma didn't try any of that cute stuff with me again.

Cathy said...

I can imagine the whole scene! LOL

Regina said...

hahahahahaha Rhonda you need to move to the city with me!! As a child my father was attacked by a mother hen for chasing her biddies and he developed a serious fear of birds. He raised all of his child to distrust and not like anything that can fly! So when I discovered that a bird was in there I would have gone in the house and left the clearing out task to the hubby! hahahaha

Kathy L said...

You have such an exciting life!!!!

lefuntz said...

A poor little birdie who was probably as scared as you nearly caused a total meltdown. And you live on a farm? You are too funny! We had an owl fly into the rafters of our school auditorium. He totally trashed the shutters on the skylights. After a couple of days of trying to get him out with no luck a teacher brought in a baby chick with a string tied around it. She put the chick in the doorway and when the owl swooped down after it she pulled the poor little chick out the door. Almost a perfect plan.

;-}

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